beauty
-noun, plural -ties.
1. the quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind, whether arising from sensory manifestations (as shape, color, sound, etc.), a meaningful design or pattern, or something else (as a personality in which high spiritual qualities are manifest).



Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Choices, Choices - Part 2 (Free to Say, "No")

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Yesterday I left off at The Turning Point of my life, where I was failing miserably at maintaining any kind of peace in my marriage and logically deducing that it meant I wasn't somehow aligning myself well enough with God's will for my life.  I believed everything would work itself out when I would start walking in step with the specific plans He had for me.  I knew commitment in marriage was king and I knew I was miserable.

Although at the time I wouldn't have phrased it like that.  I used "christian" words like "struggling, facing trials, being refined."  I boiled it down to my character needing some solid revamping and God was allowing me to go through the pain so I would be better on the other side.

It was such a disheartening place to be.  The God of the universe was giving me a hard core whipping, and I knew he was the epitome of love.  I could quote you chapter and verse from the Bible, so it had to be true.

Little doubts trickled in. I was so ready to make sense of it all that before I knew it my whole world had changed.  Truths like: "Until you are free to say, "no" you can not give a wholehearted, "yes.""

Wait, what was that?

Until you are free to say, "no" you can not give a wholehearted, "yes."

Ideas like "Love is a choice, if not it ceases to exist," and verses like, "Do two go together unless they have agreed to do so?" (Micah)  My view of God unraveled and revealed his true heart of love.  It has always been about a choice and being free to make it, yes or no.

My change of mind had to start with how I saw God.  Only from there did the understanding of how choice operates in love and relationship start to flow through my consciousness with others.  And the fog rolled away from my eyes: marriage commitment is a choice, not a duty.  Being in relationship with each other is a choice, not a duty.  Being in relationship with God is a choice, not a duty.

We are truly free to say, "no" to any of these choices.  We have to be to be able to say, "yes."

And if we are free in this way, others are too.

Part 3 tomorrow...(respecting others' freedom to say no)

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