Intentional Parenting, aka "Parenting Like You Mean It"

I'd just like to write a few thoughts I've had lately about parenting. I'm by no means an expert (only 20 months in!) so please take everything I say with a grain of salt!

Caitlin's entering the "girl" stage now and leaving all her baby ways behind. It's super fun to watch her discover new things and react so transparently to the world around her. In the last two days her vocabulary has gotten much "clearer" too and suddenly I'm understanding the words coming out of her little mouth-! What a milestone!

Of course there have been challenges along the way--I remember many of the nights when Grady and I would lie in bed just listening to her cry after putting her down at night, just so unsure about what to do for her long term best interest. And then there came needing to somehow communicate that although we understood her sign language requests, we still weren't going to say yes all the time (complicated message to get through to a one year old!). Most recently it's been issues like playing with or dropping food during mealtimes and coming when we call her or not touching what we say is off limits, etc--all first time obedience issues. It's getting more complicated but I'm so glad God has put the people and resources in our life to help guide us on a meaningful and effective path through it all.

It's on my heart to encourage all parents out there to be intentional in your role of bring up your children. This is my biggest struggle--it is SO much easier to stay sitting on the couch after telling Caitlin not to touch the Christmas tree--again--instead of actually getting up and moving her away--in effect, simply following through. Or being consistent in my instruction to not play with her full drink cup, no matter how long it takes her to behave that way. Or (my least personal favorite at the moment) actually taking her down to her crib for a few minutes of "isolation" (aka time out) when she's acting defiantly, even in little ways. It's lots of effort, but then seeing the little ways in which she does demonstrate self control and obedience already are such rewards for the hard work put in. Knowing that teaching her these things now (which she is totally capable of learning, even at such a young age!) will instill lifelong discipline and strength of character in her. There's no better payoff than knowing your child is growing up free to blossom into the person God intends for her to be because she is secure in her boundaries and in the instructional love of her parents. We love Caitlin too much to just "let her figure things out for herself," which seems like such a popular parenting attitude these days.

Of course we are only 20 months into things and have made many mistakes and are bound to continue--thank goodness for God's grace. And thank God for giving us such a wonderful gift in our daughter who is slowly but surely opening our eyes more to the intricacies of how God loves us. May you also intentionally guard and direct the children God has given you!

(And our efforts are already paying off--she fully cooperates when we put her to sleep both for naps and at night, and she's also (in general) learning how to accept our "no's" when she's asked for something--two huge blessings for our family!)