Love is a River

Love is a river

Rushing over boulders

Smoothing their rough surface

Solidifying their resolve

Flowing, moving, changing

Cool

Refreshing

Chilly

Abrupt

Its beauty overwhelms

Its consistency comforts

Its noise deafens

Its current weakens

With all its risks and challenges

I choose the river and its flow

It glistens as a diamond in the sun

It soothes as a mother’s voice at dusk

Flowing, moving, changing

Constant

True

A Quiet Moment

Closing in

Looking out

Snuggled tight

Letting go

Shutting eyes

Warm tea

Breathing in

Safety here

Pen in hand

Leather smell

Introspection

Loving well

Questions, doubts

Observation

Open heart

Imagination

Slightly smiling

Peace-filled soul

Contented feeling

Comfort of home

Being Back in the Big City

Standing outside the new Epcor building on 97th Street

Edmonton, Canada is a city of roughly a million people and big city life is always a bit of a shock when I'm back in town for a visit.  Living in the 100,000 resident city of Rochester, Minnesota, I have become accustomed to the mere 20 minutes it takes me to drive clear across town, the lack of traffic on the freeway, and the simplicity that comes with being in a smaller metro area.

What I do love in Edmonton, hands down, is the variety of restaurants...even at the mall yesterday the food court had Ukranian, Korean, Thai, Sushi, Indian and Greek places all side by side. Some of my Edmonton restaurant favs are: Boston Pizza, the Garden Bakery (Chinese), Lazia, Tim Hortons, and even the Costco fast food counter.  They have great smoked meat and poutine!

Having grown up here and moved away, my sister (visiting from her home in Melbourne, Australia) and I have been trying to put our fingers on just what Edmonton culture is and here's some of our observations:

* People are uber nice, but can be impatient when it comes to traffic
* Pedestrians are too confident that they have the right of way! (they DO, but will just step out without looking...scary)
* Style is generally function over form (a plethora of ski jackets and snow boots/running shoes)
* There is such a thing as a Canadian accent: words are pronounced very clear and tonally flat sounding
* A lot of the buildings were built in the 60s and 70s and have never been updated, so are showing their age
* There is a shortage of people to the amount of work needing to be done so customer service tends to be lacking
*  People are overly apologetic: if you bump in to them, they will say "Sohh-rry" to you
* There is an overall chilled out sense to people...low key, not easily excitable, an almost cool "professionalism"

People are so interesting, places fascinating, cultures intriguing.  I love being able to experience them!

old warehouse downtown converted to apartments

The Traditions that Bring Us Home

It is so great being at home with family this Christmas.  It has been quite a year of transition and the respite that only comes from being in a place of comfort and familiarity has felt wonderful.

Tonight we gathered with some extended family for a meal I grew up looking forward to every Christmas Eve--we would hardly eat all day in preparation to feast on the traditional Polish meal.  In the tradition of the Roman Catholic church (which my grandmother still belongs to) we eat no meat at this meal, just fish.  A staple for me are the plethora of pierogi, as well as the fuchsia borscht, a beet-based soup that you don't want to spill on your clothes.  Add a little Polish rye bread with butter and a few other dishes for variety and you have a Polish feast on your hands!

...And now we go to bed and do it all again tomorrow...this time in a traditional Canadian way, with turkey, potatoes and all the fixin's.  I anticipate a guitar jam session, lots of games, cookies, presents, stupid jokes and some ducking and covering to get away from the chaos at times.  Gotta love it!!

What Does it Mean to Be Well?

Do you have 18 minutes?  You will not regret spending them here.

If

 If I were a gemstone, I'd be a pearl

 If I were a scent, I'd be subtle floral woodsy

If I were a pair of shoes, I'd be tall, rustic boots

If I were the weather, I'd be 70, dry, and sunny

If I were a facial expression, I'd be an amused smile

If I were a time of day, I'd be early evening

If I were a month, I'd be September

If I were a place, I'd be Florence, Italy

If I were a liquid, I'd be kombucha

If I were a taste, I'd be peanut butter and chocolate

If I were a sea animal, I'd be a sea horse

If I were a food, I'd be butternut squash risotto

If were a color, I'd be warm brown

If I were a musical instrument, I'd be a piano

If I were a flower, I'd be peonies

If I were a song, I'd be Chopin's Nocturne (Opus 72)

If I were a planet, I'd be Neptune

If I were an object, I'd be a camera

If I were a fruit, I'd be raspberries

If I were a day of the week, I'd be Sunday

Togetherness

Yesterday I spent the day with some good friends and their kids (which made me miss mine like crazy, gah!).  I think it was some of the best food I've ever eaten, including the pies made from scratch that morning by one of the lovely houseguests.  I am so grateful for having been with these people!

I had a stroke of inspiration that morning and created a base "Give Thanks" scrapbook page and enough cards for each of us to write what we were thankful for.  I combined them into this collage with pictures, which is now featured in my kitchen's 12 x 12 dynamic frame!  So festive.

I'm off to stay productive on this bonus holiday...some of the things on my to do wishlist:

• put up Christmas tree
• edit two photo sessions
• finish looming travel (and etc) paperwork
• drink some delicious coffee
• work on a bonus, personal, for-fun collage
• watch a movie
• vacuum the house

How many hours are in this day again?  Good thing there's still two weekend days ahead!

Blessings to you, friends. xo

just go with it

Josie, at 4 days old

spontaneous baking 

is any day better making 

just like photo taking 

sends boredom in its boots shaking 

an uninspired life forsaking 

is feeling fear and quaking 

running from all faking 

and flaking 

a heart for realness aching 

the children, me so early waking 

hope on the creator's goodness staking 

free from shame and blame breaking 

afraid no more of my mistaking

I started this poem with the first two lines before I started counting syllables and realized I was already one too many on each line for a haiku.  Then I decided I would add a line and just do my own version of a haiku, but as I pulled up a list of "words that rhyme with baking" I couldn't stop!  It was fun. And a bit silly. (which is likely why I like it.)


In other news, I love photographing newborns! The stillness and peace is perfection to me.

Connection

Laughing

Listening

Sharing

Considering

Validating

Understanding

Smiling

Agreeing

Disagreeing

Connecting

Warmth

Comfort

Contentment

Resting

Enjoying

Relaxing

Together

Being

It feels so good to connect.

Choices, Choices - Part 3 (Others Can Say, "No," Too)

photo credit

I started out this story believing everything that happened was God's perfect (specific) will and it was my job not to mess that up.

Then yesterday I started changing my mind and working in the idea of freewill and how crucial it is to have a choice and the freedom to say, "no."

The kicker to all this is as I started understanding more about how if I was free to make choices about my life I realized that others had equal amount of ability and responsibility to choose as well.  This mattered to me because I no longer believed that God was influencing my or others' every choice and suddenly personal responsibility became a factor.

It is a huge shift to go from living in a bit of paranoia, trying not to "step outside God's will for my life" to experiencing the blessed, refreshing freedom of there not being a wrong decision.

The way I experience my relationship with God now is like I experience my kids when they have a few toys in front of them to choose from.  Red car or blue truck?  I don't have an opinion of which Connor should choose, I am just fascinated watching him figure it out himself.  I love watching him in his joy or frustration of the experience and will gladly advise him if he comes to me for help.  If not, I watch and smile.

The reason I bring up the idea of allowing others to say no is because sometimes others do.  People who have committed to us may be saying yes with their mouths and no with their actions. By ignoring the pain of that experience it only causes us to run inside ourselves and live in a false reality.  It did for me, anyway.

So as I end this 3-part series on choices, these are the truths I cling to:

• God loves me by allowing me to choose him...or not
• Others are free to be in relationship with me...or not
• Actions speak louder than words and ideals
• One of the greatest things I can teach my children is that they accept responsibility for their choices
• It doesn't help anyone to shield someone from the consequences of their choices